The Next Year

This morning I ran into an old friend at Starbucks.  I haven’t seen him in a while and I could tell he was really uncomfortable.  Yep, he’s heard the rumors.  Luke and I have filed for divorce and he had no idea what to say.

And that’s ok.  It’s been a tough couple of years at the Spence home and coming face to face with one of us unexpectedly is bound to throw you off of your game for a moment.  Ask about Dillan – the kid is a rock star and we love to brag about him.

So here is what the world needs to know:

-       Luke and I are committed to co-parenting Dillan.  This decision is in all of our best interests, but especially Dillan’s.  He deserves to be raised in a healthy home full of love and support and encouragement.  Having two homes is the best way for us to give this to him.

-       The details of how we got to this point are none of your business.  Sorry.  Don’t ask and don’t gossip about us.  Those that are closest to us have chosen to support our decision, not speculate and judge. 

-       Our marriage is not “another causality of CDH.”  Every marriage has a mix of good and bad.  The events of the past 2 years and the way we have both adapted to these challenges have fundamentally changed both of us.  In the end, we didn’t have enough good left to give to each other and need to start new lives apart.

For those going through hard times, those with sick children or insurmountable grief, I am an open book to you.  I will share the lessons that I’ve learned these last years and offer whatever support I can to help you and yours make the right decisions for your family.  But not on this blog.  Please email me or find me on facebook.

This next year will be another time of transition, adjustment, growth and learning.  I don’t know where it will lead us, but I do know that we will all be ok even if tougher days are still ahead.